Broadside Ballads: The Female Patriot, No. 1
Addressed to the Tea-Drinking Ladies of New York
From: 1770 C.E. To: 1770 C.E.
Location: New York
Note: This article has been excerpted from a larger work in the public domain and shared here due to its historical value. It may contain outdated ideas and language that do not reflect TOTA’s opinions and beliefs.
New York, May 30th, 1770.
The Female Patriot, No. 1.
Addressed to the Tea-Drinking Ladies of New York
When Adam first fell into Satan’s Snare,
And forfeited his Bliss to please the Fair;
God from his garden drove the sinful Man,
And thus the Source of human Woes began
‘Twas weak in Adam, for to please his Wife,
To lose his access to the Tree of Life:
His dear bough Knowledge all his Sons deplore,
Death thir Inheritance, and Sin their Store.
But why blame Adam, since his Brainless Race
Will lose their All to obtain a beautious Face;
And will their Honour, Pride, and Wealth lay down,
Rather than see a lovely Woman frown.
The Ladies are not quite so complisant,
If they want Tea, they’ll storm and rave and rant,
And Call their Lordly Husbands Ass and Clown,
The jest of Fools and Sport of all the Town.
A pleasent Story lately I heard told
Of Madam Hornbloom, a noted Scold,
Last Day her Husband said, “My dearest Life,
My Kind, my Fair, my Angel of a Wife;
Just now, from London, there’s a Ship come in
Brings noble News will raise us Merchants Fame,
The Fruits of our non-importation Scheme.
The Parliament, dear Saint, may they be blest
Have great part of our Grievances redrest:
“Have they indeed,” replies the frowning Dame,
“Say, is ther not some Tea and China come.”
“Why, no! We can’t import that Indian Weed,
That Duty’s still a Rod above our Head.”
“Curse on your Heads, you nasty fumbling Crew,
Then round his Shoulders the hard Broom-Stick flew,
Go, dirty Clod Pole! Get me some Shusong,
This Evening I’ve invited Madam Strong.
--Silence-- you Blockhead--hear, the Lady knocks!
Get to your Cock-Loft or expect some Strokes.”
I really tho’t you once had broke your Word”
“I ask your Pardon, dear Miss Hornbloom,
My spraling Brats kept me so long at Home;
My stupid Husband too has gone astray
To wait upon the Sons of Liberty.”
“The Female Patriot, No. 1. Addressed to the Tea-Drinking Ladies of New York [41 Lines of Verse] [New York, May 30, 1770].” The Library of Congress, www.loc.gov/resource/rbpe.10400700/.
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