The Birth and Care of a Child
“The Birth and Care of a Child” from When I was a Boy in Persia by Youel Benjamin Mirza, 1920
Note: This article has been excerpted from a larger work in the public domain and shared here due to its historical value. It may contain outdated ideas and language that do not reflect TOTA’s opinions and beliefs.
“The Birth and Care of a Child” from When I was a Boy in Persia by Youel Benjamin Mirza, 1920
The common idea prevailing in various countries as to the treatment of girls in Persia upon coming into this world has been greatly exaggerated. It is true that the birth of a boy brings more happiness to the family than that of a girl, but the mere fact that the mother has given birth to a daughter is no sign at all that the girl infant is to be persecuted.
The birth of a boy is, of course, an event of great importance in the life of young parents. In the first place the mother is practically a stranger in her mother-in-law's household, and bringing a son to her husband's family makes her doubly appreciated. In the second place the birth of a boy is more welcome because the son will soon grow up and be an addition to the strength of the clan. Thirdly, the youngster is expected to succeed his father in his trade or profession and to perpetuate the memory of his family. On the other hand, the joy of the family is not so great at the birth of a daughter because the infant is expected to leave the family the day of her marriage and thus her connection with her father's house becomes of less importance than that of a boy.
When a baby is born the friends, neighbors, and relatives begin to pour in and congratulate the young parents. Upon the birth of a boy the family begins to entertain friends most lavishly. The samovar (the brass teapot) is all the time boiling to the brim. No one comes in or goes out without drinking some good tea and eating the sweet nokhols (candy). On such occasions the village poor are always remembered. Being too poor to pay their calls to the home where a new light has dawned, members of the happy family take to them wheat, flour, cloth, raisins, and nuts. They eat and drink, give praise to Allah, petitioning him to prolong the life of the mother and her child and to soon give the family another son.
When the callers are through with their visits they depart with the following exclamation: "May the foot of your maid be blessed and may God preserve her to you. We hope the next one may be a boy!" Should the. infant be a boy they say: "May the foot of your young man be blessed. May God spare him to you and make him like hair that is never exhausted, but grows again when cut or pulled out. May Allah not think one son enough for you.”
No Birth Records
Among the Persians, birth records are hardly ever kept. The children therefore have no birthdays or birthday parties and presents. The only way that they can tell the age of a child is by associating the day or the year of the birth with some great event. For instance, should a boy be born a few days before or after Christmas or around about Easter or during the Nourooz (New Year) festival, there will, of course, be no trouble in keeping his age straight. But should the child be so unfortunate as to be born at the time when there is no saint celebration, festival, or big event he will have to go through life without really knowing his age.
The age questions do not enter their minds and people are only as old as they feel and no one worries about his age or thinks that age is "against him.” Such was the case of my paternal grandfather. No one knew his age. Some thought that he lived over a hundred and fifteen years, others claimed that he died at the ripe age of one hundred and five years. Every one, however, agreed that he lived in his village over a hundred years. There was really no way of determining his correct age. But one thing is certain, that from what I remember of him he lived to be a very, very old man. On account of his great age he remained in his bed for nearly four years before his death and had to be waited on. Being too feeble to start his pipe I used to start it often by taking the first few puffs; when I finally had the pipe ready I would put it in his hands; he would then bless me and call me "Azizim" (beloved).
Receiving a Name and Title
When a boy is eight days old he is given a name. At the celebration of this rite the mullah (the priest) performs religious ceremonies by reading the Koran and finally giving the child the name desired by his parents. In the case of a girl there are no religious ceremonies. Her name is chosen by her parents and is given to her by a woman relative. The procedure is quite simple. The infant girl is taken in the arms and her name is whispered in her ear three times, i.e., by saying to the girl three times, "Fatima, Fatima, Fatima that is your name." The fortunate young lady therefore will forever have the favored name of Fatima.
The child, as well as a grown-up man, is always known and called by the first name. For instance, if a boy's name is John, and his father's name is Albert, the boy is known as John bar, or Ben Albert, i. e., John after, or son of Albert. Very few have surnames, for there are no family names in Persia to hand down from one generation to another. Upon marrying, the girls never change their names. If a young lady's name was Almas bar Abdullah before her marriage, she would be known as such ever after. There is no word in the Persian vocabulary corresponding to the English word, "Mrs." In the higher grade of society a woman is known as "Khanum," meaning lady. If she is married to a man by the name "Mustafah” she would be known as Mustafah Khanum.
The most common names in Persia are Ali, Hassan, Hosein, Gula and Abdul. Nearly ten per cent of the Persian boys are named All, and an equal number bear the name of Hassan and Hosein, etc. They are very fond of combining these names. One bov will be known as Abdul Hassan, and should his father have a title such as "Khan," he will be known as Abdul Hassan Khan. Should he become proficient in his studies to the extent of being able to read and write well he will be known as "Mirza.' Therefore his full name would be Mirza Abdul Hassan Khan.
There are several other names and titles a boy can have by making pilgrimages with his parents to various holy places. He can add the title of Meshadie by visiting the Mosque of Imam Riza at the city of Meshad, or that of Hadji by going to Mecca and circling seven times the tomb of the Prophet Mohammed.
The girls, not being able to travel, do not possess any religious titles. Often one will marry a Hadji or will induce her parents to take a journey so that she can boast about it.
The most favored girl names in Persian are Fatima, Almas, Sheran, Lalla, and Cadija. The number of girls named after Fatima, the famous daughter of Mohammed, is greater than that of all other girls put together.
The Evil Eye
Persian children are extremely healthy, and if they had the modern scientific methods in dealing with various epidemics there would be indeed very little sickness among them.
The evil eye is always held responsible for a child's sickness, when really the illness is caused by the ignorance of mothers, grandmothers, and nurses; the latter's influence being the most predominating factor in a Persian household.
Through the ignorance of their parents, the children are often subject to cruel treatment. I have seen with my own eyes little babies being bathed with cold water alongside a brook when the water was really too cold to drink. When the baby, from being exposed to cold weather, had pneumonia, the evil eye was blamed because some one had seen the beautiful figure of the infant being bathed and had forgotten to say “Mashallah.”
In order to frighten the unseen spirits the village folk stick on poles the skulls of animals and dress them up to look like half men and half beasts.
To avoid the evil eye, strangers must not see the face of a baby for at least three months after its birth, and as soon as possible a priest must be consulted with regard to the safety of the child. In order to prevent a youngster from being molested by the evil eye the priest writes a prescription in Arabic made up with prayers and verses from the Koran. The document is then neatly folded and sewed in a little bag dotted with blue beads and fastened on the infant's right arm.
Sometimes it was advisable to dress the youngster in very unbecoming clothes and keep it as unattractive as possible, for fear, if he should look too handsome, the unseen spirits might cause his sickness and death. I have seen ignorant parents fill a baby's eyes for several days after it was born with black powder. They believed by doing this the infant's eyes got stronger and more beautiful as they grew older.
The precaution taken against the evil eye and unseen spirits are not by any means limited to what has been just said. It is thought to be very dangerous to leave children alone for fear that devils may take them away. One way of preventing the children from being kidnapped by unseen spirits, they say, is to throw a man's trousers on them. When the babies are left alone they believe that genii will come and nurse them.
The following story illustrates the fear a mother entertains in her breast of devils and unseen spirits, and will perhaps make clear to the reader the great amount of stupidity and superstition still existing among the Christian inhabitants of Persia. An infant was not quite old enough to be left alone in the house for fear that one of the evil genii might take it away. It happened, however, that the mother of the baby found it necessary to pay a visit to some of her neighbors, and not having a nurse to care for the baby in her absence the question as to how the infant was to be cared for required a great deal of thought. Should the mother take it with her and expose it to the public eye? This she considered as dangerous as to leave it alone in the house.
The mother finally decided to leave it at home, and as a protection against the genii she placed on its breast a piece of bread, a pair of scissors, and a picture of Christ, and departed. Upon her return she was greatly surprised and amazed at the fact that the baby was not to be found where she left it. She began screaming, pulling her hair and shouting like a lunatic for fear the evil genii had stolen the baby. The fact of the matter was that the healthy youngster had rolled around and around until it was stopped by a big sack of flour and there it stayed hidden from his mother's eye.
After carefully searching her house the mother found the baby behind the bag and just about that time the cock crowed, which was a warning sign. The next day she reported the case to the village priest by whom she was informed that the evil genii would steal children when they were not properly cared for by their parents, and that, "if you had not found it before the cock crew, you would never have seen it again!' The priest finally went to her home and by mentioning the name of Christ and the Cross, and by offering certain prayers, he drove away the intruders and thus prevented the genii from making a second attack on the child.
Sickness and Epidemics
Due to various epidemics, the life of a child is in great danger. The diseases which prevail in Persia are the ordinary diseases that one has in the United States. They are, however, more prevalent in Persia and appear in most aggravated forms.
Thousands of children, through not being vaccinated, die every year from small-pox. The year I had it several of my playmates died with this loathsome disease, but through my mother's gentle and tender treatment my life and my body were spared from its effects. In order to prevent me from being marked she tied my hands and kept me from scratching myself.
Besides smallpox, children are affected with diphtheria, cholera, whooping cough, tuberculosis, nervous and mental ailments, all forms of eye trouble, and the ordinary fevers. Not having any maternity hospitals in Persia, naturally thousands of babies die on account of not being properly attended.
The treatment and suffering of children are due to the ignorance rather than to the fault of their parents. When children are ill they are never neglected or unattended. I have known parents to stay up all night watching over their sick child, and nothing was omitted by them that would reduce the suffering. I can frankly state that during my boyhood days in Persia I never saw mistreatment of children by their parents, and neither have I witnessed a man dragging his wife's name in the courts or molesting her in any way. In fact the men are extremely kind to their families.
To corroborate this statement let me quote a few words of Dr. John G. Wishard, who lived and practiced medicine in Persia for over twenty years. He says: “Near by the hospital was a young mother who took cholera and her husband cared for her with great tenderness and thoughtfulness, but in spite of all that was done for her she grew rapidly worse. Finally she declined to take medicine and her husband, in his extreme anxiety for her recovery, remarking that the medicine was pleasant, put to his lips the spoon which she had been using. In a few hours he developed the disease, and in order to hide from his wife his own illness he excused himself by saying that he must go to inquire concerning the welfare of his father's household. He died a few hours after his wife's death, without knowing that she had gone on before. They were buried with their new-born baby a few hours later.”
The epidemics in Persia come quite frequently, and their control is almost impossible, consequently when a child is born the parents, from the time of its birth until the baby has reached the age of ten years, look forward to these epidemics and ponder in their sadness how they can avoid them or cope with them. However, once a child has passed this dangerous age its troubles are almost over, and it is practically assured a long life.
Mirza, Youel Benjamin. When I Was a Boy in Persia. Lothrop, Lee, Shepard Co., 1920
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