Russian Marriage Customs
Suppose the fancy of our fine young peasant lad, encouraged by his successful dealings at the "yarmark" into thinking that he is now able to set up a home for…
“Russian Marriage Customs” from Russian Festivals and Costumes for Pageant and Dance by Louis Harvy Chalif, 1921.
Proposing Marriage
Suppose the fancy of our fine young peasant lad, encouraged by his successful dealings at the "yarmark" into thinking that he is now able to set up a home for himself, has been greatly taken by some maiden with whom he has danced at the fair, he will take his parents into his confidence at once and ask their help.
The marriage agent "swacha" will be sent for and instructions given her. She will immediately go to the "izba" of the fair one's parents and after being received with the usual kindly greeting of "milosty prosim" will open negotiations with some such poetically ambiguous phrase as this: "A white dove has escaped from our house has it not come to you?" Appealed to thus delicately, the mother, if she does not favor the suit, will reply with equal delicacy: "We have not seen your dove; it is not with us we do not know what has become of it." But if the proposal is pleasing to the parents, the answer will be more simple and frankly encouraging. Vodka and cakes will be brought to treat the "swacha" who will then ask the down-right question: "Do you wish to be related to So and So?" The mother will reply: "The relationship does not displease us."
No sooner has the match-maker departed than a family council is called and the girl informed of the proposal. At this, whether opposed or in- wardly rejoicing, the maiden feels it to be the proper thing to weep abundantly. Should the idea really be repugnant to her, her wails and protestations will be so overwhelming that there can be no choice but to break off negotiations at once. If the decision is favorable the swacha's next task is to arrange a day upon which the bridegroom and his parents may be received by the bride's family. At this ceremonial visit the callers beg the mother to show them the bride. Summoned, the young girl enters the great living room of the izba dressed in all her best, bows very low to her future parents-in-law and retires.
Marriage Settlements
The groom's parents then ask the family of the bride to pay them a visit of inspection, "podvoria smotret," and assure themselves that their daughter will come to a suitable and well-kept home. On this visit, the bridegroom's father meets the family of the bride with bread, salt and vodka. Candles are lighted; all the family as- sembles and a prayer is offered, after which the matter of the dowry is settled. A return visit is made at which the customary exchange of bread takes place; after this there can be no going back, under penalty of dire and lifelong misfortune or so it is believed.
At this time the young man makes a present of money, usually about seven roubles, to his fiancee. The parents shake hands and solemnly break into pieces and distribute a cake in token of the union between them created by this marriage, and the equal sharing of the burden. And now the etiquette of the occasion calls for more tears from the bride-to-be, and her distracted appeal to her parents to be told "what she has done to be sent away from her home." But for all this pretense of grief and loud lamentation, it is evident that the situation is regarded as anything but lamentable, for she goes to the church, accompanied by her godmother, on the day before the wedding, and takes part in a service of thanks- giving. Afterward, she kneels before the priest to receive his blessing.
Dress the Bride
When the great day comes, the bride's friends assemble to prepare her for the ceremony. As an omen of the prosperity they wish her to enjoy throughout her married life, they present her with bits of ribbon, of gold and of silver. That she may never lack bread, a bit is sometimes slipped into her bodice, while a shred of wool attached to her skirt insures the increase of the flock, or a strand of flax, abundance of linen. The brilliant "sarafan" or skirt of red or other gay color is donned over a wonderfully fine embroidered blouse, which is itself covered next by a beautiful "fata" or sort of jacket either made of the richest brocaded material or else gorgeously embroidered. Then the bridesmaids place upon her head the most important feature of the costume the bridal headdress or crown, called "kokoshnick." Some of these crowns are heirlooms and very valuable. Constructed in large part of seed pearls with semi-precious stones abundantly used to give color, and strands of the pearls and jewels intermingled forming a collar to match, they well deserve the name of "crown." The bride's long hair, either flowing or in loose braids, and just showing a little in front under the open work of pearls, is not the least of her adornment. And a scarf or veil called the "namitka," made of fine silk and ornamented with choice embroidery, falls down behind from the kokoshnick.
Now the bride is ready for the coming of her mate. The fun-loving villagers are ready, too, and have a rope stretched across the izba's entrance. When the groom comes up in a gaily decorated sledge or carriage with all his family and relatives, toll must be paid in small gifts before the party is allowed to enter. The groom had best beware of making the gift too small, or his vehicle may have its wheels loosened or other mischievous tricks be played upon him.
Wedding Ceremony
On the way to the church the groom precedes the bride, both being careful to salute every one they meet for fear of the "evil eye." In church, as the couple approach the altar, their young friends eagerly watch to see which of them first steps upon the silken carpet spread before it, for that one will dominate over the other. The tall candles on either hand are also closely watched to see which partner will be the longer-live.
The ceremony is long and very elaborate, including, at one stage, the placing upon the bride-groom's head of a wreath of white flowers and long streamers of ribbon, producing a rather ludicrous effect to western eyes, unused to much masculine adornment. At last all is over, the newly married couple head the procession back to the izba of the bride's parents. There they find two tables spread with finest embroidered cloths and towels and decorated with wooden candlesticks trimmed in gay ribbons and colored paper. One of these tables is called "the sweet table" and is for relatives and friends ; the other, "the betrothal table," is for the bridal couple and their immediate families. At the head of this table a bench covered with white embroidered linen stands to receive the presents of coins offered the pair with the wish "that they may never want for money." It is the privilege of the bride's godfather to lead them to the seat of honor. But it is a rather "empty honor," as according to etiquette the bridal couple are not supposed to eat or drink. In receiving the wedding presents now brought to them by their friends, the bride kisses each donor three times. Next, the regular meal of twelve courses begins, and all through it the young people sing the well-known wedding songs, while one of the singers passes a plate for the reception of the "money presents" before referred to. The feast ends with the serving of tea, and then begins the dancing.
The Second Day's Observances
The next day another church service must be attended by the bridal party, including the "swacha" or match-maker. This important personage must now, unobserved, place a wooden spoon in the way of the feet of the bridal pair as they follow the priest around the pulpit in one part of the service. If they tread upon it, they thereby free themselves from all sickness and harm.
Again at the bride's home the guests are refreshed with vodka and good things to eat. Now comes the solemn rite of dressing the bride's hair in matronly fashion. The bride and groom are seated side by side upon a bench, and a towel is brought and held stretched between them so that they cannot see each other. On the bride's side of this improvised wall the woman friends rearrange her hair, pinning it up and completely cov- ering it as married women do in Russia. Then a mirror is brought and both must look into it before the veil is removed.
Bringing Home the Bride
After this the bridal sleigh or carriage is brought to the door and the couple go as quickly as horses can carry them to their own home. There friends receive them with volleys of pistol shots and a generally hilarious welcome. The house izba is wreathed with evergreen garlands, and streamers of white, which is the emblem of peace. A triumphal arch has been erected of greens and flowers with flags waving from it, and the groom's mother and father are waiting at the door with the symbolic bread and salt and the house's "ikon." The young couple kneel before the holy image and then kiss each parent three times. Again the bride's godfather leads the pair to the seat of honor at the table to which all present draw near and drink their health, kiss them and again drop small coins or other presents into a plate. Finally the wedded lovers kiss each other three times and remove to another table where the real meal is eaten to the same ac- companiment of songs and followed by dancing as on the day before.
The Third Day's Tests
The special feature of the third day's wedding festivities is the testing of the bride's patience by the playing of all kinds of tricks upon her. The friends strive to embarrass her by getting in her way; they throw small coins before her which she should deftly pick up and secrete. If she does not succeed, the bridegroom is held responsible for all her failures, and sometimes, also, the "swacha" is beaten for her pretended fault. Then the bride interposes between them and begs pardon for her clumsiness. A ransom of vodka is demanded to settle the matter. Occasionally the bride is kidnapped and carried off in a sledge until vodka is paid to redeem her, or, perhaps, a little money. These practical jokes involve quite serious risks now and then.
The mildest form of teasing consists of continually questioning them as to whether they love each other and whether they are a happy couple. They are expected to answer by a fervent embrace and the usual triple kiss. One teasing remark is, referring to the bride, "Gorkaia," "She is bitter." To this the groom responds, "Then I'll make her sweet" and once more kisses his patient spouse.
A Few Words About Color
Although it was my original intention to give the full and detailed color scheme of each costume pictured, later consideration led me to decide that this would be useless as well as wearisome and confusing.
Costume, especially feminine costume, must always be adapted with a view of its becomingness to the wearer; also, of course, to its proposed use. The exactitude desirable in a historical pageant must yield, in the case of dancing, to the need for freedom of movement./ In all cases, essential character should be carefully preserved; but the world will still move on quite comfortably even though national dances be performed in skirts far shorter than the etiquette of the peasant village where the costume originated would approve. It therefore seems to me sufficient to indicate the general taste and tendencies of the Russian peasant in the matter of color.
Broadly speaking, as I have mentioned elsewhere, the Russians' taste is derived mainly from nature with which they live in close communion. This means that their favorite colors are the primitive ones, clear and simple. It is true that this has been somewhat modified since the reign of Peter the Great, who took an intense interest in native arts and products and broadened their scope by introducing western ideas and a wider range of coloring.
And, though it is a digression from our subject of "color.” it will perhaps interest you to know that the great Peter's solicitude was not confined to the decorative arts. He thought the art of the dance so important that he directed a Lutheran pastor Pastor Gregory to choose forty boys, twelve to sixteen years old, from the families of rich merchants of Petersburg and train them in dancing. Thus was laid the foundation of the late Imperial Ballet School of Russia.
But to return to our "color" though the Czar Peter may have enlarged his palette for him, twenty czars could never wean the Russian peasant from his love of brilliant hues, especially his adored "krasny" red. It will give you a measure of this preference to tell you that in Russian the word is a synonym for beauty. "Pre-krasny" means "very beautiful," and "krasa vitza," "a beauty." And where the western writer, treating of marriage in verse or prose, speaks of "bridal white" and of the "veil and orange blossoms," the Russian as you probably know uses "the Red Sarafan" as his bridal symbol. Do not conclude, however, that the skirt of the Russian bride is always red, any more than that an all-white costume is essential for brides of other lands. Should the rich, warm tints of the bride's hair and complexion seem to her and her mother or, perhaps, her betrothed better set off by blue, green, or light yellow, one of these will be the predominating shade.
In choosing your colors, always remember that it will be the safer choice, because more characteristic, to have them pure and bright. 'Next to red, perhaps, the Russian peasant maid loves blue, which would be the blue of the forget-me-not or of a clear, spring sky. For a darker shade copy the corn-flower. And, speaking of flowers, let your red be the red of the poppy and your yellow that of the ripe wheat. In greens, a strong, leaf-color is oftenest seen, with the pale "apple" tint in "second place." Russet brown is well liked for outer, winter garments, but is apt to be relieved with some kind of ornamenting in the gayer hues. Embroidery in gold thread is greatly liked and adds to the generally dazzling effect of the festal attire. Slippers, when worn, are often thus adorned; but boots are the more usual peasant footwear for women as for men.
You will note, in the pictures, a great deal of 'brocaded material. The peasant indulges in this to the extent of her means ; and, while she will be sure to pick out the patterns containing most of the brighter colors used in her own native fabrics and embroideries, there will always be more of the half-tones belonging to western color schemes than you would find in an entirely peasant-woven and made costume.
In the "kokoshnick" or head-dress, brilliant effects are obtained not only by using rich-hued velvets or satins for foundation, but also by a great variety of gay-colored beads or semi-precious stones mingled with the seed pearls which are most important in its construction. And the veil or scarf, "namitka," which falls down behind may be as variegated and as brilliant as you please.
To sum up, I would say, let your color motto be “simplicity with harmony." Within these limits, you may "go as far as you like." Above all, in seeking becomingness do not forsake "character," and you will not fail of attaining "beauty."
Chalif, Louis Harvy, Russian Festivals and Costumes for Pageant and Dance, Chalif Russian School of Dancing, 1921.
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